My dating Seinfeld moment

Consistent with the online dating law that I live by, I had asked this woman for coffee on the 2nd e-mail I sent her. She said I moved "so fast". I politely wrote her back saying that you can't really get to know someone through e-mail. I probably also threw in my signature cuteness and flattery as well, but I knew she was most probably a lost cause. I'd give her 24 hours. If she didn't write back she never would. About three days later I deleted not only her e-mail but hid her profile. This is a psychological, symbolic thing for me which says, "I don't acknowledge your existence. I am moving on." Maybe the next day I get an e-mail from her apologizing, saying her friend's mother died, but she might be free over the weekend. I had seen this a million times before. This was sort of an up-yours way of rejecting people. I almost didn't even write her back. I didn't tell her that I was going to be busy on Sunday, because that would betray the fact that I was on to her. I opted to give her a polite e-mail saying that I understand and she could take as much time as she likes.

To my shock I get an e-mail from her saying she is free over the weekend. This broke what I thought was a universal law of the dating universe. It was a little disillusioning, because I thought I had understood the dating universe. I arranged a Saturday date with this woman. The problem was that in deleting her e-mail I had deleted her name, and had forgotten her name.

On Saturday I arrive at our meeting place, a coffee shop, a bit early. I look around. A woman is looking at me. I don't see too well without my glasses. She doesn't look like the woman in the photo. Sometimes women look a lot different than in their photos, but she is looking at me, is thirty something, so it has to be her. So I walk over to this women. I cannot say "Are you so and so?" So I say, "Hi, I'm, Ed." And she says to me. "Oh I'm not the person you're looking for." I was terribly embarrassed, apologized and made a hasty exit for the door. And she says to me as I am walking away, "I was looking at you because you looked interesting." I think that she had read my body language and knew what had happened, and she was just trying to save me some embarrassment.

Half-way into the actual date it started to really bother me that I didn't know her name, so I confided in her what had happened, and I told her the story about the woman I had mistook for her. And my date thought this was all very funny. She said, "It sounded like that woman liked you. Wouldn't it have been interesting if you had sat down with her and started talking to her." And I had not even thought about this. This was a very disconcerting thought. And I said, "I bet I would have really pissed you off." And she said "No, I'm a writer. These sort of situations are interesting for me." It was at this point that I knew that I wanted to see this woman again.