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Thursday, February 24, 2005

Invitation to Che-Lives.com

Hi, I produce the TalkWarrior.com internet radio show. It appears as if someone from your community posted a comment to one of my blog entries about Che Guevara. Here is the URL:

http://talkwarrior.com/2005/02/che-guevara-racist-homophobe-and-anti.html

He seemed pretty upset about what I had said and claimed that my ideas about Che Guevara and your website are wrong. As I indicated in my comments, I am welcoming anyone from your community to come on our radio show and clear the record.

I plan to devote the first show of the new season to Che Guevara. This show is scheduled to air on 03/05/05 at 1:00 p.m. (Eastern Time). If you or someone else from your community would like to appear on the show, please let me know. We can find a time to do the taping that is convenient for you. I will be happy to pay for the phone call.

Moshe, the host of the show, agrees to be amiable and polite to any guest from your community that appears on the show. However, there are some tough questions about Che Guevara's bigoted comments that need to be addressed.

Dickie

Sunday, February 20, 2005

The Barney pill

Now Barney has his very own government domain -- barney.gov, which redirects to the White House website. I'm so glad that Bush is putting my tax dollars to such good use. The excitement over this wonderful dog almost made me forget that yesterday suicide bombers killed 39 people in Iraq and that the day before, three members of the American military were killed in Iraq, bringing the "American Military" death toll up to 1,466. I almost forgot too that we had no legitimate fucking reason whatsoever for invading Iraq. Gooooo Barney!

The nerd of your dreams

Are you a legally blind nerd that would not normally stand a chance in hell of getting sex? Well, through some type of black magic, AmericanSingles.com is able to find Rosie Perez look-alikes to clamp their legs around your shoulders and go crazy.

Killer Terillian Devilbeasts

Do you think this pair of little black baby goats is cute? It just goes to show you how naive you are. These are not baby goats. They are full grown Terillian Devilbeasts, from outer space, one of the most dangerous species in the cosmos. Devilbeasts will literally rip your lungs out through your left nostril if you so much as look at them the wrong way. Even if you're nice to them and treat them with respect, you'd be lucky to survive with all your limbs in tact. So you better watch out! It ain't no goddamn petting zoo in outer space.

Friday, February 18, 2005

Man from another planet

Don't be fooled by this man's monkey-like features, or the fact that he appears to be hanging onto a branch. This happens to be a Bontangian Woolerbee, a member of one of the most advanced extra-terrestrial species in the cosmos. When earthlings were first learning how to make fire, Woolerbees were using advanced particle physics to project themselves to other dimensions. This particular Woolerbee happens to have two doctorates in theoretical physics, one in medicine, and an honorary degree in Andromeda Literture from Andromeda Galexy University.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Pig from another planet

Pork Chop (shown below) is a dairy pig from planet Neptar. This might seem odd and even disgusting to you, but for practically everyone else in the cosmos, the thought of drinking milk from a cow is positively revolting.

Space Bird

A strange bird from outer space, performing in a galaxy-wide dance competition.

Relax granola crunchers

Don't wig. It's just steam! Really. The nuclear power industry should consider putting all that steam to good use, such as steaming some nice delicious glow-in-the-dark hot dogs.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

John Trubee rants against "Enterntainment"

I am too diseased to enjoy most entertainment anymore.

I used to like THE OUTER LIMITS as a kid but I bought some episodes at the local video store--and now it all looks like a bunch of silly hocum bullshit: an amorphous monster from another dimension somehow enters ours, threatens and kills people, then is ultimately destroyed by the bewildered scientists or by some hero or by circumstances. A stentorian narrator voices over some pseudo-profundity, some fake philosophical malarkey--and we're all supposed to buy it as some insight to the "human condition" or some enlightenment to our lives. In the meantime I have just wasted an hour of my life.

Entertainment? No--bullshit. I don't have the time or patience to have my time and patience wasted by carny barkers. If this makes me a Byronian grump, so be it.

Feh! Feh! Feh!

And the Grammys? Remember all those kids you hated in junior high school? Remember how they all wanted to be in the talent show and ham and mug onstage, little applause whores like Sammy Davis Jr., neurotically needing attention from everyone else? Remember how the votes were fixed--how they were all friends who voted for each other to win their stupid, fake prizes? Remember how you thought they were all pathetic, hammy dipshits?

Now look at the Grammys. And The Oscars. And The Emmys. And the Golden Globes. And The Tonys. Regardless of whoever wins in whatever year for whatever work: how is this information of benefit to my life?

I was over at my pal Carl Franzoni's house the night before last. I was flipping through the TV channels by remote (I do not have cable at my place--thank God). We watched a bit of 'Speed 2' with Sandra Bullock and a shipload of screaming extras on a cruise ship pirated by a creepy mofo played by Wilhem Dafoe. I knew if I watched it all I'd be treated to ages of screaming extras in life vests drenched by splashing water with the camera jiggling at cockeyed angles, that Sandra Bullock would win and Wilhem Dafoe would die--but only after something really bad happened to the ship. Do I really need to see this shit? For what purpose or meaning? What value is this crappy visual information, this alleged "entertainment" to me?

You see how "entertainment" is a waste of our precious time on earth? If you have no goals or nothing to accomplish on this earth, then by all means--jump in the cesspool of entertainment stupidity. It's a wonderful waste of time.

Take a walk around a cemetery every once in a while as I do. Remind yourself that you will soon be there yourself. That'll help focus your mind on what is valuable in life as opposed to what is bullshit. It'll help you can get down and take care of business--and flush all the bullshit out of your life.

Do you really want to waste your life being "entertained" by bullshit?

John Trubee
PO Box 4921
Santa Rosa, CA 95402 USA
A junkyard dog staked to a short chain
chasing himself in tight circles of sorrow and madness"

Copyright (C) John Trubee, 2005

Monday, February 14, 2005

CIA produced Gulf War 1 leaflet translated

Below are images from a CIA Gulf War 1 leaflet, meant to persuade Iraqis to surrender. I have translated the Arabic to English.

Better watch out, Iraqis, or we will take our Stealth Fighters and blow your shit up. Stealth Fighters actually do not do close air support because they have no defensive capability, and rely too heavily on "stealth." But since we're the Central "Intelligence" Agency and consider you to be a bunch of towel-head morons, we thought we could just slip this one by you.



In case you didn't get the message in the first image, we will really, really fuck your shit up. We're not kidding!



You got two choices as we see it. You could either end up a charred, burnt up skeleton, or you could run for your fucking lives.



Again, in case you missed one of the images above, or weren't looking very carefully, we're going to blow you up. And your gas trucks too, so don't even think about fucking with us.



So just surrender. After you surrender, we'll all sit around the campfire, make somemores, and have a few laughs. We promise not to make any insulting camel jokes.

Saturday, February 12, 2005

The Cheerleader in Chief



I respect George W. Bush for being a fascist who is not afraid to reveal his feminine side. You'll never find a photo of Adolph Hitler or Benito Mussolini in a cheerleading outfit, giving three cheers for the home team. This is because these men were too busy acting macho to really appreciate the beauty and freedom of Metrosexuality. They didn't understand that the mass killing and torture of a population does not preclude having and showing a feminine side.

I hope that the fascists of the future will follow Bush's footsteps and take up traditionally feminine activities. I also think that there's nothing wrong with showing cowardice, and that Bush and Cheney should not feel any shame for being draft dodgers. I hope that in the future we will see more cowardly and effeminate killers of innocent babies.

Dickie the Parrot

John, I have finally had time to really read these quotes of yours that I posted on my website. The one that I like the best is this:

"Nobody likes whiners and complainers; thus I have taught myself to automatically parrot 'Great! Great! That's great! in insincere social blandishments in order to avoid being murdered before my time."

--John Trubee


The reason is, THAT IS ME! Whenever someone says, "How ya' doing?, or "How was the movie?" or "How was the flight?" I automatically say GREAT! I don't even think about it. I can have a 104 degree temperature, and be on the verge of vomiting -- and I instinctively say FUCKING GREAT! NEVER FELT BETTER! I just think, the better I say I
am, the less apt they are to probe me and bother me, or have a wig-out and accuse me of being a bitchy-moany complainer. I am literally a parrot: GREAT GREAT GREAT GREAT!

People who complain about complaining really have no clue what sickening whining complainers they are themselves.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Nuclear Blast Protection



This image was procured from one of my favorite government websites, ready.gov, where they explain to you how to survive a nuclear attack amongst other ludicrous things. Under the caption of this image they say "Consider if you can get out of the area."

What I don't understand is how, if the blast goes off on "Broadway," as indicated by the map, and you're on Broadway, as indicated by the map, how your vaporized atomic particles are supposed to move your ass off of Broadway, to that street running across from "Main."

I wonder how many thousands of dollars went into this fucking nonsense website, when it could have had at least a fighting chance to do some good in HUD.

Pug Pray-off

President George W. Bush bows his head as Representative J.C. Watts, Jr. (R.-Okla.) leads a prayer to Satan. Both men pray so hard that they get nose bleeds.


Flying Saucer One

Earth Ambassador to the United Galactic Lizard Empire, George W. Bush is seen walking towards Flying Saucer One. Following behind are Bush's staff persons. Like Bush, his staff are wearing human disguises, but are really space lizards who are operating under direct orders of the Imperial Lizard King, George "Gecko" Bush, King of the Space Lizards, and Patriarch of the Bush Reptilian dynasty.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Three Pug Prezs

The two former Republican ex Presidents, Bill "Chubby-Chaser" Clinton and George Herbert Walker "1000 Points of Light" Bush look on as our President and savior, George Walker "Bring it on" Bush signs landmark legislation, easing the burden and suffering of millionaires in the United States.




My e-mail to Yahoo Personals staff, who blocked my personal ad

Please forgive me for that horrible word I used in my Yahoo Personals ad: "Shitloads."

O heavans, I wouldn't want to introduce such foul language to all the children on Yahoo Personals looking for relationships. Awhhh-geez, shucks, that word "shitloads" was a real no-no. A doozy.

I was wondering if you could suggest another word that I could use in place of "shitloads." How about "Mickey-Mouse-loads" or "Donald-Duck-loads". What do you think?

I'm glad that the fortune that you expect me to pay for Personal Ad subscriptions is being put to good use, and that your WORD POLICE are constantly vigilant and on the job 24/7, making sure that my wording is pure and G-rated.

Perhaps for now I stick with Spring Street Networks, who do not police my thought. But when I become a Puritan, Disney-loving type of guy, I'll be sure to pay Yahoo for a subscription.

Thanks Rodrick,

And thanks to all the THOUGHT PATROL at Yahoo Personals!

Moshe Moscovitz


------------------------------------------
Thank you for writing to Yahoo! Personals.

Your personals ad profile was not approved because your ad's text
contains a profanity (shitloads).

If you have questions regarding whether or not specific ads are
appropriate in Yahoo! Personals, please refer to the Yahoo! Personals
Guidelines, located at:

http://personals.yahoo.com/info/guidelines.html

Yahoo! reserves the right to remove ads that are in violation of our
Terms of Service or the Yahoo! Personals Guidelines.


Regards,

Rodrick

Yahoo! Customer Care
http://www.yahoo.com/

13062391


Original Message Follows:
-------------------------

>>REDFRMCON




Mail-Id: 1107882325-4931

Name: Moshe Moscovitz

Yahoo! ID: moshe_moscovitz

Personals ID #
Moshe Moscovitz

Subject: Saved Profiles

Problem description: Hi,

My personal ad was rejected,

"Your description, headline or personals
name was not accepted because it is
obscene, profane, vulgar, or contains
too much personal information. Your
profile will not appear on our site or
in search results until its has been
updated and resubmitted."

I'm really puzzled what the obscenity,
profanity, or vulgarity is, especially
in light of the fact that the ad was
previously accepted and I had made only
minor changes. Please help me out.

Do we have your permission to enter your account if we need to
investigate further?
Yes

While Viewing: http://help.yahoo.com/help/us/pers/pers-05.html

Reading is Fundemental

Kids, reading is so important. There's nothing like curling up with a good children's book, especially when your country is in the midst of a terrorist attack.

Uh oh...

Luara: Ahhh, George, I think my Irritable Bowel Syndrome is acting up. I think I'm having a problem ... a big problem.

George: If you think you got it bad, this blasted dog I carry around with me everywhere just shit on me. Just keep smiling, hon.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Quotes by John Trubee

"Behind love's hypocritical mask schemes a monster whose vocation is barfing new life into the world. For what purpose? There is no purpose."
--John Trubee

"God and Satan are hallucinations within the skulls of those who project them out into the world with which to grapple and shift blame as a strategy to evade personal responsibility. True believers resemble psychotic beasts."
--John Trubee

"To refuse to acknowledge the dark side and to always hide pain and disease and death
is to lie about life."
--John Trubee

"Overconfidence and unreflective optimism are borne of inexperience, incuriosity, and a dearth of knowledge. Beware of the strutting men of action."
--John Trubee

"I'd rather speak my mind than win the popularity contest. That popular people are popular implies that they think of nothing provocative to express or that they, like craven weakling ninnies, muffle it in deference to favorable public opinion."
--John Trubee

"It is preferable to have nothing to lose. It encourages you to do colorful and outrageous and provocative things. This is preferable to existing merely as a bland, conformist, mediocre normal terrified of the opinions of others."
--John Trubee

"We are essentially naked against eternity, and time eventually blows us and everything we own to the winds not unlike a passing, indifferent foot crushing an ant colony. Our tortured and incessant clawing after money is laughably meaningless in the face of eternity."
--John Trubee

"The reward for working hard and playing by the rules: they give you permission to exist for another day so that they can continue to steal more time from your life."
--John Trubee

"Nobody likes whiners and complainers; thus I have taught myself to automatically parrot 'Great! Great! That's great!' in insincere social blandishments in order to avoid being murdered before my time."
--John Trubee

"The difference between normal people and me is I possess the ability to remove my blinders to face grim, despairing reality with utter joy and unperturbed confidence. Normal people kill themselves when circumstances and new information force them to countenance reality devoid of socially-induced delusions."
--John Trubee

John Trubee
PO Box 4921
Santa Rosa, CA 95402 USA
"A junkyard dog staked to a short chain
chasing himself in tight circles of sorrow and madness"

Copyright (C) John Trubee, 2005

Monday, February 07, 2005

"Waking Up Angry," by John Trubee

I've noticed that many mornings I awaken angry. Not a full-throttle rage nor a specific upset; rather, the nebulous snit of a resting body that wishes to remain resting, a body that realizes it's tromping a treadmill of meaningless activity just for the money. If you pause to consider that so much of our waking life is monopolized by JUST GETTING MONEY to support our existence, while so many of our wants and needs and goals and dreams are interminably postponed for this endless circle of meaningless activity just to get the money, just to live another day, just to trudge through the meaningless circle yet again innumerable times--if you dwelled upon it too much it'd drive you mad! Our invaluable lifetimes are forever squandered in empty cycles of absurdity.

Get the money to eat to live another day to get the money to eat to live another day to get the money to eat to live another day to...

In the realm of dreams the body/mind continuum considers what it needs and wants; the alarm clock informs us only of what we HAVE to do. It resists, the body resents the clock and the imperative of external expectations, the body dances this eternal circle as if in a zombie's dream.

John Trubee
PO Box 4921
Santa Rosa, CA 95402 USA
"A junkyard dog staked to a short chain
chasing himself in tight circles of sorrow and madness"

Copyright (C) John Trubee, 2005

Sunday, February 06, 2005

Che Guevara: Racist, Homophobe, and Anti-Semite

I just love a good Commie propaganda flick. I am Cuba is one of my favorite movies of all time. This being the case, I was a real sucker for The Motorcycle Diaries, a poignant and beautiful film about Che Guevara's travels through South America on his motorcycle with his friend. The film is based on Che Guevara's written memoir of the same title. The film reeked of propaganda because the Che Guevara character was a saint that stood for moral righteousness. He was more God than man.

What people who want to foster the myth of Che Guevara don't want to tell you -- what the movie does not tell you, is that Che Guevara was a racist, an anti-Semite, and a homophobe. I have selected the least ambiguous quotes from The Motorcycle Diaries -- the book, to illustrate my point. Keep in mind while reading the quotes that Che Guevara was not only a medical doctor, but talked incessantly about the ignorance and petty prejudices of people of all social classes.

Quotes from The Motorcycle Diaries (2003, Ocean Press):

"The blacks, those magnificent examples of the African race who have maintained their racial purity thanks to their lack of an affinity with bathing, have seen their territory invaded by a new kind of slave: the Portuguese." (p. 161) 

"The black is indolent and a dreamer; spending his meager wage on frivolity or drink; the European has a tradition of work and saving, which has pursued him as far as this corner of America and drives him to advance himself, even independently of his own individual aspirations." (p. 161) 

"The episode upset us a little because the poor man, apart from being homosexual and a first-rate bore, had been very nice to us, giving us 10 soles each, bringing our total to 479 for me and 163 1/2 to Alberto." (p. 150)

"The first person we hit on was the mayor, someone called Cohen; we had heard a lot about him, that he was Jewish as far as money was concerned but a good sort." (p. 139)

"The somewhat animal-like concept the indigenous people have of modesty and hygiene means that irrespective of gender or age they do their business by the roadside, the women cleaning themselves with their skirts, the men not bothering at all, and then carry on as before." (p. 116)

By the time Che had written The African Dream he certainly had either changed his bigoted outlook towards blacks or become smart enough to portray himself as someone who did not appear harbor beliefs of racial superiority.

Since the time that I originally posted this, a myriad of ignorant, right-wing assholes, including  neo-nazis, have used these quotes in order to validate backward beliefs that they acquire from exploitative fuckwads like Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'rielly, and Adolph Hitler. I have some reason to believe that Bill O'rielly himself used these quotes that I dug up. I didn't post these quotes to support the right-wing asshole agenda. In addition, many of you right-wing assholes have chosen to lift these quotes and not give me credit. Some of you have even altered what I said. Let me take this opportunity to inform you right-wing assholes that you are a bunch of ignorant fucking cocksuckers. And fuck you! And I mean, really, really fuck yourselves.

I wrote this because I just wish that people would stop idolizing Che as if he were some type of God. It was never intended to be right-wing fodder. You pathetic and ignorant right-wing chuckleheads and you motherfucking neo-nazi scum are ignorant fucking losers.

Steal This Book

I was recently looking at a copy of Abbie Hoffman's Steal This Book online. I've read the actual book a while back, and every time I read it, I love it. Partly for its revolutionary zeal and partly for how ludicrous parts of the book are.

Here is one of my favorite passages in the book:

"Those ridiculous free introductory or subscription type letters that you get in the mail often have a postage-guaranteed return postcard for your convenience. The next one you get, paste it on a brick and drop it in the mailbox. The company is required by law to pay the postage. You can also get rid of all your garbage this way."

There's been several occasions in my life where I was pissed off enough at an organization, that I've wanted to attach a brick to their postage-guaranteed mailer. The only thing that stopped me was that I wasn't sure if it was still legal. And even if it were legal, you'd still probably have the Postal Inspector hassle you. It's just not worth the trouble, no matter how deserving institutions are of having bricks taped to their postage-guaranteed mailers.

Friday, February 04, 2005

Moshe "Moses" Moscovitz





Moshe "Moses" Moscovitz was born in 1965 to an American mother living at the time in the Falkland Islands, which was, at the time, part of Argentina before the British Royal Navy came in 1982, killed everyone who opposed them, and declared the Falklands part of their petty, crumbling, piss-ant empire.

Moshe is known by many in Central and South America as the "Jewish Che Guevara" because of his revolutionary zeal and the fact that like Che Guevara, Moshe is also from Argentina. In the United States, Moshe is commonly known as the "Scourge of Limbaugh," because of his ruthless verbal assault on the Dittoheaded masses.

George W. Bush
"There is a connection between Moshe Moscovitz and the 9/11 terrorist attacks. We shall stay the course against the enemy which is Moshe, and we shall prevail. Don't think you can misunderestimate me, Mr. Moscovitz!"

Dick Cheney
"Moshe Moscovitz, that rotten cocksuckin' motherfucker piece of shit."

Andy Kaufman
"Moshe Moscovitz is my bastard child."

Elvis Presley
"Moshe Moscovitz is my bastard child."

Rush Limbaugh
"Moshe Moscovitz is nobody's bastard child. He's just a bastard."

Abbie Hoffman
"Moshe Moscovitz stole my book, 'Steal this Book.' The bastard."

The Dalai Lama
"I'm not a violent man, but whenever I hear that Moshe Moscovitz guy, I want to kick his ass so hard, that he'll taste his asshole."

Satan
"I like Moshe Moscovitz. He's a nice guy. I would've treated him like a king in hell. Given him a harem of beautiful women to have sex with for all eternity. But the goddamn son-of-a-bitch just refuses to assist the Republican Party. He's a serious obstruction to the age of darkness I'm trying to bring about on earth, and I just don't know what to do about him. Perhaps he's gay. Maybe if I offer him a harem full of handsome men..."

God
"Many people have asked me whether Moshe is the Messiah. And this I will not tell you. But what I will say is that Moshe is most certainly the King of the Jews. God bless Moshe."

Thursday, February 03, 2005

John Trubee


TalkWarrior.com is proud to have one of the greatest living American rock composers — John Trubee, providing music for Moshe's show, Live from Mt. Sinai.

Musically speaking, John Trubee is the second coming of Christ. (He may even be the second coming of Christ non-musically speaking as well.) If you cannot appreciate the
genius of Trubee's music, than you are either deaf, retarded, or some type of pathetic John Tesh fan.

Don't take our word for it. Please check out Trubee's samples at emusic.com and keep listening to Live from Mt. Sinai for more great Trubee tunes. If you have any Trubee requests, call them in live on Moshe's show, and he will play them.

John Trubee Contact Info:

John Trubee
PO Box 4921
Santa Rosa, CA 95402 USA

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Gore Vidal sucks

Message posted on Che's forum:

Gore Vidal, author, historian?

Author maybe. I've never read his 3000 page books, but I've read a play he wrote called "Visit to a Small Planet," which was very popular. The play really, really sucked.

Gore Vidal is not a historian, he's just created this "image" that he is one. I don't know of any academic degrees that Vidal has in history. Perhaps he has some formal education in history, but he sure don't advertise it.

Vidal is a pompous asshole who is in love with himself. He is the left-wing equivalent of William F. Buckley Jr. I'm not sure which man is worse, or which man is more excruciatingly ugly. Buckley is probably worse, but only because his politics are evil.